Something to lighten the mood

[techtool]

Looks like a lot of used parts to me. Might be some hidden gems in there but certainly hard to find, as you said.

 

[cracked case]

School report
Pupil's name:
Robert J. Van de Graaff
Tutor's impression:
Robert has a lot of potential, a shocking amount of potential.

 

[chrisb]

We know who we are

 

[techtool]

Even if you know, it could just be too late...

 

[Cal Weldon]

If you spend your time chasing butterflies,
they simply fly away.
If you build a beautiful garden,
the butterflies will come to you.
If they don't,
you still have a beautiful garden.

 

[simon7000]

Cal,

Sorry I just have to…

If you want to see butter fly just toss a piece out of a high window.

 

[Cal Weldon]

Geez Ed thanks for spoiling such a prophetic and special moment.
I spent six minutes rewriting what I found on the internet to get it to my liking.
I hope you're happy with yourself.

Now if you'll excuse me, I will be happy just sitting in my garden watching,
the Butterflies, flutter by.




Oh gawd, I sound like a hippy.
Well, being at the end of the Boomers, I guess I can deal with it.
Time for peace and love.
And you know what?
I've asked myself many times - what the hell is wrong with that anyway?

 

[Galu]

Why was the butterfly not invited to the dance?

Because it was a moth ball.

 

[techtool]

Now if you'll excuse me, I will be happy just sitting in my garden watching,
the Butterflies, flutter by.

Oh gawd, I sound like a hippy.

And if you're truly a hippy, you might even see an elephant fly.

 

[Galu]

Oh gawd, I sound like a hippy.

 

[techtool]

Yes, it's much safer to stay home and watch the Pink Elephants.

 

[Cal Weldon]

So on my way home, I get pulled over.
Cop says to me:
Nothing wrong sir, but in all my years on patrol, I've never seen anyone drive so within the limits like you, especially in this neck of the woods, if you know what I mean.
I winked at 'im, an' I says:
You know how it is orifice, when you're as loaded as I am, you gots to be careful.

 

[soundbrigade]

This is not a good reply when being pulled over for speeding:
- As I am pretty drunk, I speeded to get home quick enuff to avoid any accident ...

 

[simon7000]

Or as the driver’s wife chimes in facing towards the officer who pulled them over, “Honey you know you always speed when you are drunk.”

 

[tobydog]

The last 3 posts. Hilarious when you get hit by a drunk driver, really lightens the mood

 

[simon7000]

Actually the guy who drove head on into me was using drugs.

If you don’t understand defensive humor, stay away from sharp objects.

 

[Audio>X]

Is this a drug ???

 

[tobydog]

Actually the guy who drove head on into me was using drugs.

If you don’t understand defensive humor, stay away from sharp objects.

Ah, veiled humour🙂

 

[myleftear]

A friend of mine was on her walk home when she got stopped by offissas for some generic control, she probably was quite 'loaded' too.

Offissa wants to check her alcohol level and asks: "Have you ever blown before?"
Her: "Like this? no..."
Offissa: "..."

 

[cracked case]

Officer " I believe you are drunk sir"

Driver "thank f### for that, I thought my steering had gone"

This didn't get a humours response from the police.