Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with an ant?
A: A dead ant.
😀
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LOL.
I always kept some bone left over from asado.
Instead of a monkey, help me my parrot Pepe.
Grrrrrrrrrrrr !😀
An externally hosted image should be here but it was not working when we last tested it.
An externally hosted image should be here but it was not working when we last tested it.
Don't worry, my jokes are too old, the issue is laugh a little.😉
- How do you fit an elephant in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Put him in the front seat.
- How do you fit two elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Put both in the front.
- How do you fit three elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Two in the front, one in the back.
- How do you fit four elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Two in the front, two in the back.
- How do you fit five elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- You can't fit five elephants in a Volkswagen, dummy.
- How do you know there are four elephants in your house?
- There's a yellow Volkswagen parked in your driveway.
- How do you know there are four elephants hiding in your backyard?
- There's a yellow Volkswagen parked in your driveway, your house is empty and you have a cherry tree in your backyard.
Hint: Change "toe nails" by "balls" in quote.😉
Of course, that you can't tell a little boy.😀
- What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
- Tarzan finding an elephant while picking cherries.
- How many elephants can you fit into a Mercedes?
- Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.
😀
Hey Anatoliy, nice speakers, the first reminds me of a joke.
I understand the irony, but I'm talkative today.😀
Don't worry, it will pass soon.😉
I understand the irony, but I'm talkative today.😀
Don't worry, it will pass soon.😉
LOL.
I think that only now understand it, a monkey and a dog, that is! 😎
I have big ears, and saw the picture said, that's me! 🙂
But, what do you expected? I think slowly ... 😀
I have not read all the posts so you may have this one already.
We were discussing termites at Parish Council at church last week.
Q. What do you get if you cross a termite with a praying mantis?
Ans; A bug that says grace before it eats your house!
Cheers, Jonathan
We were discussing termites at Parish Council at church last week.
Q. What do you get if you cross a termite with a praying mantis?
Ans; A bug that says grace before it eats your house!
Cheers, Jonathan
- Which is the animal having feet on the head?
- The louse.
- Why elephants do not use the computer?
- Because of the mouse.
- What an elephant says to a naked man?
- How can you breathe with that little trunk?
- Why the roosters do not have hands?
- Because chickens do not have boobs.
- Why do dogs lick their genitals?
- Because they can.
😀
- The louse.
- Why elephants do not use the computer?
- Because of the mouse.
- What an elephant says to a naked man?
- How can you breathe with that little trunk?
- Why the roosters do not have hands?
- Because chickens do not have boobs.
- Why do dogs lick their genitals?
- Because they can.
😀
Boredom is the pleasure of knowing you have nothing to do.
Boredom is to feel over time slowly ...
I'm not bored, just very patient.
Being bored is the easiest way to kill time, and the longest.
Those who kill time ... Do not they arrest?
😀
Boredom is to feel over time slowly ...
I'm not bored, just very patient.
Being bored is the easiest way to kill time, and the longest.
Those who kill time ... Do not they arrest?
😀
more boring than clash of turtles.
more boring than to see grass grow.
more boring than to defecate with no desire.
more boring than to dance with sister.
more boring than sucking a nail.
more boring than Stephen Hawking's dog.
more boring than this thread.
😀
more boring than to see grass grow.
more boring than to defecate with no desire.
more boring than to dance with sister.
more boring than sucking a nail.
more boring than Stephen Hawking's dog.
more boring than this thread.
😀
- If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
- If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
- If Superman is so smart, why has underpants on the outside?
- If a homicide is to kill a man, a suicide is to kill a Swiss?.
- If I buy a new boomerang, how do I get rid of old?
- If a word was misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know?
- If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from?
- If the product says "Do not use if safety seal is broken", how one is supposed to consume?
- If jail and prison are synonymous, why are not jailer and prisoner?
- Why "separate" is written all together and "all together" is written separate?
- Why women with more aerodynamic curves which offer more resistance?
- Why are the walls of cemeteries so high, if those inside can not leave and those outside do not want to enter?
- Why the incredible Hulk break all his clothes less pants?
- Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains and wool sweaters does?
- Why don't make airplanes with the same material used to make the black box?
- Why, if our planet is covered in 2/3 of water is called "Planet Earth"?
- Why to shut down Windows, go to the Start button?
- Why Bill Gates called his operating system "Windows", if you could have called "Gates"?
- How they put the posters of "Do not step on the grass"?
- Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
- Do children enjoy childhood as much as adults enjoy adultery?
- What count sheep to sleep?
According to statistics, a person is hit by a car every 5 minutes.
- How does this person do to survive?.
😀
- If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
- If Superman is so smart, why has underpants on the outside?
- If a homicide is to kill a man, a suicide is to kill a Swiss?.
- If I buy a new boomerang, how do I get rid of old?
- If a word was misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know?
- If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from?
- If the product says "Do not use if safety seal is broken", how one is supposed to consume?
- If jail and prison are synonymous, why are not jailer and prisoner?
- Why "separate" is written all together and "all together" is written separate?
- Why women with more aerodynamic curves which offer more resistance?
- Why are the walls of cemeteries so high, if those inside can not leave and those outside do not want to enter?
- Why the incredible Hulk break all his clothes less pants?
- Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains and wool sweaters does?
- Why don't make airplanes with the same material used to make the black box?
- Why, if our planet is covered in 2/3 of water is called "Planet Earth"?
- Why to shut down Windows, go to the Start button?
- Why Bill Gates called his operating system "Windows", if you could have called "Gates"?
- How they put the posters of "Do not step on the grass"?
- Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
- Do children enjoy childhood as much as adults enjoy adultery?
- What count sheep to sleep?
According to statistics, a person is hit by a car every 5 minutes.
- How does this person do to survive?.
😀
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Who inspired Heisenberg to formulate the uncertainty principle?
A girlfriend that he had
- When he knew where she was, did not know whom.
- When he knew with whom she was, he did not know she was doing.
😀
A girlfriend that he had
- When he knew where she was, did not know whom.
- When he knew with whom she was, he did not know she was doing.
😀
LOL.
It's true, appearances can be deceiving.
A blind rabbit and a blind turtle collide in the forest.
In order to recognize, they agree to touch each other.
The turtle says:
- Your hair is very soft.
- Your ears are long.
- You have pompom tail.
- I know! You are a rabbit!
The rabbit nods and says:
- Your neck is wrinkled.
- You don't have ears.
- You have helmet.
- I know! You are Niki Lauda!
😀
It's true, appearances can be deceiving.
A blind rabbit and a blind turtle collide in the forest.
In order to recognize, they agree to touch each other.
The turtle says:
- Your hair is very soft.
- Your ears are long.
- You have pompom tail.
- I know! You are a rabbit!
The rabbit nods and says:
- Your neck is wrinkled.
- You don't have ears.
- You have helmet.
- I know! You are Niki Lauda!
😀
There is a dearth of food in the jungle, the lion suggests that making jokes and who make laughing all the animals are saved and not killed.
- Comes the rabbit and says a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the rabbit.
- Comes the bear tells a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the bear.
- Comes the horse and tells a very bad joke, nobody laughs and begins to laugh the turtle and says: very good joke by the rabbit! Lol.
😀
- Comes the rabbit and says a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the rabbit.
- Comes the bear tells a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the bear.
- Comes the horse and tells a very bad joke, nobody laughs and begins to laugh the turtle and says: very good joke by the rabbit! Lol.
😀
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