Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with an ant?
A: A dead ant.
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LOL.
I always kept some bone left over from asado.
Instead of a monkey, help me my parrot Pepe.
Grrrrrrrrrrrr !
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An externally hosted image should be here but it was not working when we last tested it.
Don't worry, my jokes are too old, the issue is laugh a little.
- How do you fit an elephant in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Put him in the front seat.
- How do you fit two elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Put both in the front.
- How do you fit three elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Two in the front, one in the back.
- How do you fit four elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- Two in the front, two in the back.
- How do you fit five elephants in a yellow Volkswagen?
- You can't fit five elephants in a Volkswagen, dummy.
- How do you know there are four elephants in your house?
- There's a yellow Volkswagen parked in your driveway.
- How do you know there are four elephants hiding in your backyard?
- There's a yellow Volkswagen parked in your driveway, your house is empty and you have a cherry tree in your backyard.
Hint: Change "toe nails" by "balls" in quote.
Of course, that you can't tell a little boy.
- What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
- Tarzan finding an elephant while picking cherries.
- How many elephants can you fit into a Mercedes?
- Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.
I see, you understand according to your mood.
LOL.
I think that only now understand it, a monkey and a dog, that is!
I have big ears, and saw the picture said, that's me!
But, what do you expected? I think slowly ...
- Which is the animal having feet on the head?
- The louse.
- Why elephants do not use the computer?
- Because of the mouse.
- What an elephant says to a naked man?
- How can you breathe with that little trunk?
- Why the roosters do not have hands?
- Because chickens do not have boobs.
- Why do dogs lick their genitals?
- Because they can.
- The louse.
- Why elephants do not use the computer?
- Because of the mouse.
- What an elephant says to a naked man?
- How can you breathe with that little trunk?
- Why the roosters do not have hands?
- Because chickens do not have boobs.
- Why do dogs lick their genitals?
- Because they can.
- If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
- If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
- If Superman is so smart, why has underpants on the outside?
- If a homicide is to kill a man, a suicide is to kill a Swiss?.
- If I buy a new boomerang, how do I get rid of old?
- If a word was misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know?
- If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from?
- If the product says "Do not use if safety seal is broken", how one is supposed to consume?
- If jail and prison are synonymous, why are not jailer and prisoner?
- Why "separate" is written all together and "all together" is written separate?
- Why women with more aerodynamic curves which offer more resistance?
- Why are the walls of cemeteries so high, if those inside can not leave and those outside do not want to enter?
- Why the incredible Hulk break all his clothes less pants?
- Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains and wool sweaters does?
- Why don't make airplanes with the same material used to make the black box?
- Why, if our planet is covered in 2/3 of water is called "Planet Earth"?
- Why to shut down Windows, go to the Start button?
- Why Bill Gates called his operating system "Windows", if you could have called "Gates"?
- How they put the posters of "Do not step on the grass"?
- Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
- Do children enjoy childhood as much as adults enjoy adultery?
- What count sheep to sleep?
According to statistics, a person is hit by a car every 5 minutes.
- How does this person do to survive?.
- If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
- If Superman is so smart, why has underpants on the outside?
- If a homicide is to kill a man, a suicide is to kill a Swiss?.
- If I buy a new boomerang, how do I get rid of old?
- If a word was misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know?
- If corn oil is made from corn, what is baby oil made from?
- If the product says "Do not use if safety seal is broken", how one is supposed to consume?
- If jail and prison are synonymous, why are not jailer and prisoner?
- Why "separate" is written all together and "all together" is written separate?
- Why women with more aerodynamic curves which offer more resistance?
- Why are the walls of cemeteries so high, if those inside can not leave and those outside do not want to enter?
- Why the incredible Hulk break all his clothes less pants?
- Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains and wool sweaters does?
- Why don't make airplanes with the same material used to make the black box?
- Why, if our planet is covered in 2/3 of water is called "Planet Earth"?
- Why to shut down Windows, go to the Start button?
- Why Bill Gates called his operating system "Windows", if you could have called "Gates"?
- How they put the posters of "Do not step on the grass"?
- Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
- Do children enjoy childhood as much as adults enjoy adultery?
- What count sheep to sleep?
According to statistics, a person is hit by a car every 5 minutes.
- How does this person do to survive?.
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LOL.
It's true, appearances can be deceiving.
A blind rabbit and a blind turtle collide in the forest.
In order to recognize, they agree to touch each other.
The turtle says:
- Your hair is very soft.
- Your ears are long.
- You have pompom tail.
- I know! You are a rabbit!
The rabbit nods and says:
- Your neck is wrinkled.
- You don't have ears.
- You have helmet.
- I know! You are Niki Lauda!
It's true, appearances can be deceiving.
A blind rabbit and a blind turtle collide in the forest.
In order to recognize, they agree to touch each other.
The turtle says:
- Your hair is very soft.
- Your ears are long.
- You have pompom tail.
- I know! You are a rabbit!
The rabbit nods and says:
- Your neck is wrinkled.
- You don't have ears.
- You have helmet.
- I know! You are Niki Lauda!
There is a dearth of food in the jungle, the lion suggests that making jokes and who make laughing all the animals are saved and not killed.
- Comes the rabbit and says a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the rabbit.
- Comes the bear tells a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the bear.
- Comes the horse and tells a very bad joke, nobody laughs and begins to laugh the turtle and says: very good joke by the rabbit! Lol.
- Comes the rabbit and says a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the rabbit.
- Comes the bear tells a very good joke and everyone laughs except the turtle, kill the bear.
- Comes the horse and tells a very bad joke, nobody laughs and begins to laugh the turtle and says: very good joke by the rabbit! Lol.
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