Here's a computer science joke I have heard from a friend of mine:
He has a Linux kernel that he named after his girlfriend.
Christer said:
When you load that German cost Guard video, look to the top, for the listing of associated videos. On the far right, will be a link-image..of a family in a car. Click on that one.
When I look at that situation concerning that woman, live or memorex..I withhold the idea within myself of thinking that I know everything ..and then consider her claims.Then I look at the feeble amount of what it is that we know vs what we think we don't know.
The tally shows that there is potential to be truthful with ourselves to the point of stating that we know only 10% or less of what there is to perceive in this universe. In other words, 90% or so, possibly more-possibly less (why does it even need a damn number attached to it? ) of the universe remains unknown.
And one cannot truthfully expect that within 'knowing' that 10%, that 'being in the middle of the herd', regarding so-called 'knowledge' in science, that this middling knowledge defines the outer edges of understanding, those outer edges that are going to be indistinct and blurred for the entire existence of humanity..that through such a ignorant system of labeling..that I can somehow flat out label this woman insane.
All I can say, is that in taking the time and effort to consider that she is not crazy and investigating from that standpoint can potentially get me further down the road in new understandings in science, than the folks who outright label her as nuts - with no investigation of her situation.
It goes right down the line into that things like that line from Max Plank of: "Science advances, funeral by funeral"
You guys all know this, as a point of information written on paper. Whether you actually recognize it, or not, as a fundamental sin that should not be committed by any person who does scientific investigation...is another matter altogether.
What I see is folks who think they like to either dabble in science, or do it fully in a professional nature, indulging in one of the points that science -as a point and system of investigation- does outright reject. And that is John Curl's current signature, which is: Condemnation, without investigation, IS prejudice.
In other words, blind objectivity does not define objectivity, it only defines the ignorance of blind objectivity. It is an attempt at reductionism, without accounting for the flawed mechanism that is making the observation, the emotionally driven and emotionally defined human brain.
And that ain't science. It's human emotions. Pure monkey brain behaviour.
I do like the 1.8MVa/600Kv toy, though. That's way out there.
http://www.eclh.nl/vaklokalen/wiskunde/Gedachten lezerken.htm
Open the link
Think of a random number between 0 and 99
Deduct both numbers from the original. Example 54 – 5 – 4 = 45
Remember the symbol next to the obtained number.
Click on the gray square.
Enjoy.
/Hugo
Open the link
Think of a random number between 0 and 99
Deduct both numbers from the original. Example 54 – 5 – 4 = 45
Remember the symbol next to the obtained number.
Click on the gray square.
Enjoy.
/Hugo
Turns out that friend of mine is really good at making me LOL.
"If I was a MOSFET, Hannah must be well above my threshold voltage since she turned me on."
"If I was a MOSFET, Hannah must be well above my threshold voltage since she turned me on."
An old one........, apologies if this isn't funny.
Qn: Why did the moron go round and round?
Ans: His friend told him that one good turn deserves another.
Qn: Why did the moron go round and round?
Ans: His friend told him that one good turn deserves another.
Not engineering joke that is but never the less funny.
A small zoo in Glasgow acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.
Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.
Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Boaby McKay, a local lad & part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.
Boaby, like many Glasgow folk, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Boaby was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for £500 ? Bobby showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.
The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions:
1. "First", Boaby said, "Ah'm no gonnae kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.
2. "Second", he said, "Ye cannae never tell naebody aboot this." The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.
3. "Third", Boaby said, "I want all the weans raised as Celtic fans." Once again it was agreed.
4. "And last of all", Boaby stated, "You gotta give me another week to come up with the £500"
A small zoo in Glasgow acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.
Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.
Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Boaby McKay, a local lad & part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.
Boaby, like many Glasgow folk, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Boaby was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for £500 ? Bobby showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.
The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions:
1. "First", Boaby said, "Ah'm no gonnae kiss her on the lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.
2. "Second", he said, "Ye cannae never tell naebody aboot this." The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.
3. "Third", Boaby said, "I want all the weans raised as Celtic fans." Once again it was agreed.
4. "And last of all", Boaby stated, "You gotta give me another week to come up with the £500"
Research in South Africa has led to the discovery of the heaviest element
yet known to science.
The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it
an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since
Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected,
because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally
take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 5 years; It does not decay, but
instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass
will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe
that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical level of
concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical ***.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as
many peons but twice as many morons.
yet known to science.
The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it
an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since
Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected,
because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally
take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 5 years; It does not decay, but
instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass
will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe
that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical level of
concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical ***.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as
many peons but twice as many morons.
Power in South Africa
The previous post brings to mind that South Africa is experiencing daily power outages lasting anything from one to six hours, reportedly because the electricity generating capacity of the country has been outstripped by demand. These outages are expected to continue for anything up to 7 years, since new power plants take time to construct and commission, and for some reason, nobody thought of doing this until it was too late.
A joke that's going around there at present is:
Up to 1994 South Africa had White Power
From 1994 South Africa had Black Power
Now South Africa has NO POWER!
Vasbyt, mense
The previous post brings to mind that South Africa is experiencing daily power outages lasting anything from one to six hours, reportedly because the electricity generating capacity of the country has been outstripped by demand. These outages are expected to continue for anything up to 7 years, since new power plants take time to construct and commission, and for some reason, nobody thought of doing this until it was too late.
A joke that's going around there at present is:
Up to 1994 South Africa had White Power
From 1994 South Africa had Black Power
Now South Africa has NO POWER!
Vasbyt, mense
Oh no, plenty people saw it comming and government has received warnings for 10 years about the impending situation, it is just that they chose to buy submarines (which we don't have crew for) to get financial kickbacks and cheap mercedeses.
Only one politician was found guilty, spend a few weeks in jail and is now, while still on parole, reelected to the executive commitee of the governing party...
His parole was not even revoked when he was caught in a DUI incedent recently.
Only one politician was found guilty, spend a few weeks in jail and is now, while still on parole, reelected to the executive commitee of the governing party...
His parole was not even revoked when he was caught in a DUI incedent recently.
SY said:Referee has to blow the whistle and warn the players:
No politics!
Ja - gedog julle klomp gaan Robben-eiland toe gestuur word!
[Translation: Thought you lot will be sent to Robben Island (local equivalent of Texas)]
Jackinnj,
Whose pre-amplifier is that in the picture?
Wonder if they had power on the Island last night...
Went off here at 8:45pm till 3am
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20080202085440582C328909
Went off here at 8:45pm till 3am
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20080202085440582C328909
If this was the dirty workshop thread, YOU'D be the one going to texas for the colour coded stationary.
Love the cats, why is it that cat's are almost invariably more pleasant to be around than people...
Love the cats, why is it that cat's are almost invariably more pleasant to be around than people...
Re: Assistants
Hey John, as you are an engineer they should surely be called Black Cat A and Black Cat B !
John Hope said:
Hey John, as you are an engineer they should surely be called Black Cat A and Black Cat B !
- Status
- Not open for further replies.