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Old 31st October 2002, 11:15 AM   #11
Fred Dieckmann is offline Fred Dieckmann  United States
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Location: Spain or the pueblo of Los Angeles
Default An engineer,an artist and an architect

An engineer,an artist and an architect
An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the passion and mystery he found there.

The engineer said, "I like both."


Engineer: "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done."

mirabile dictu,

P.S. And neither of them will know about Miss Lo Tess CoOp........... who looks good and can solder!
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Old 31st October 2002, 01:48 PM   #12
DocP is offline DocP
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Location: Dublin, Ireland
If we're going for versions of the balloon joke...

A man is lost in a hot air balloon and decides to let some air out to find out where he is. As he desends he sees a man crossing a field and calls out "Where am I".

The man hears him but doesn't answer.

Unfortunately the balloonist lets out too much air and crashes into the field whereupon the walker comes over and states "You're in a field."

The balloonist looks up at him and says "You're a mathematician, aren't you ?"

"How did you know ?" replies the walker.

"Well," responds the balloonist, "your answer is absolutely accurate, too late, and completely useless."
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Old 31st October 2002, 03:23 PM   #13
Dustin Haug is offline Dustin Haug
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Location: Charleston, SC
A lawyer, a doctor and an engineer are waiting to tee off one day ahead of them is a threesome who are hacking away slowly not making any progress whatsoever. The lawyer asks the greenskeeper "What's going on with these guys?", and he replies that "They're a group of fireman who went blind saving the clubhouse from a huge fire so they let them play for free whenever they want."

The doctor says, "That's terrible, I know a fantastic surgeon who may be able to help them some."
Not to be outdone the lawyer boasts, "I know a superb lawyer who can get them tons of money for their suffering."
The engineer who's been quiet thus far pipes up "Couldn't they just play at night?"
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Old 31st October 2002, 07:52 PM   #14
Nisbeth is offline Nisbeth  Denmark
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More engineering humor
Default Another one...

A physicist, a mathematician and a biologist sit in a cafe ovelooking the street. Two men walk into a house across the street and then ten minuts later three men walk out of the house. The physicist says: "The calculations are wrong". The biologist says. "Oh no, they reproduced". The mathematician says: "Hey, if another guy goes in there itīll be empty again"

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Old 31st October 2002, 08:31 PM   #15
Christer is offline Christer  Sweden
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Location: Sweden
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer were all faced with
the problem of deciding the volume of a certain red rubber ball.
The mathematician immediately observes that balls are spherical
and so measures the diameter and calculates the volume. The
physicist submerges the ball into a water filled vessel of known
geometry and then measures how much the water level changed,
from which he calculates the colume of the ball. Finally, the
engineer takes up the ball, turns it around slowly for a couple of
minutes while inspecting it closely with his eyes. Finally he finds
the model number, takes out his red-rubber-ball table from his
pocket, looks up that particular model and reads out the volume.
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Old 1st November 2002, 12:37 AM   #16
mrfeedback is offline mrfeedback  Australia
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Default Doh! Pattern Male Baldness...

"Why are engineers bald on the front of their heads ?".

"Because when their mistake is explained to them they "Oh yeah, that's right and slap their foreheads".

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Old 1st November 2002, 03:51 AM   #17
jackinnj is offline jackinnj  United States
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More engineering humor
Default Doctors are (kind of) engineers:

<b>Gynecologist joke:</b>
A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and was on the
verge if being burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands
would be beneficial, he decided to change careers and become a mechanic. He
found out from the local technical college what was involved, signed up for
evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the
time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully
for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a
score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying "I don't
want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wondered if
there had been an error which needed adjusting."

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly,
which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together
again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." The instructor went
on to say, " I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it through the
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Old 1st November 2002, 05:41 AM   #18
mirlo is offline mirlo  United States
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A mathematician, physicist, and engineer were contemplating prime numbers.

The mathematician said "3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime ... therefore I conjecture that all odd numbers are prime."

The physicist said "3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is an expermental error, 11 is prime, 13 is prime, ... yeah, looks like you're probably right. All known odd numbers appear to be prime."

The engineer said "3 is prime, 5 is prime, 7 is prime, 9 is prime, ..."
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Old 3rd November 2002, 01:26 PM   #19
ARAD is offline ARAD  Germany
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Location: Bavaria
I received this some time ago from another HIFI fanatic...

Attached Images
File Type: jpg engineersview.jpg (81.9 KB, 3632 views)
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Old 3rd November 2002, 03:22 PM   #20
dice45 is offline dice45  Germany
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Location: Munich, Bavaria

you have any manual?
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