how many forum members does it take

[sss]

to change a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all
over again.

[anatech]

Hi sss,
Why did you bring this old topic up again??

In future please do a search before posting.

-Chris

[sss]

Originally posted by anatech
Hi sss,
Why did you bring this old topic up again??

In future please do a search before posting.

-Chris

sorry

[anatech]

Now where is poobah when you want him?

[SY]

to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

Please, this is an English language forum with certain standards. An apostrophe denotes a possessive, not a plural.

[pinkmouse]

How many moderators does it take to kill...

[poobah]

I feel so dirty now...

I have been using apostrophies for that plural thing too... against my better knowledge. This would not have happened were it not not for all the damn acronyms... IMHO.

sss,

Add to your list: 1 pontificating genius to nitpick people's punctuation.

[anatech]

There he is!

One big hairy fella who will admit to misusing the English language.

SY, I think we all run the rules of grammar through the blender.

I gots to go now.

-Chris

[poobah]

OK,

time to be little more serious here; add to the list:

1 to say that he has been changing light bulbs for 30 some years and knows many secrets, and then divulges none of them.

2 to argue back and forth endlessly as to whether a light bulb is driven by current or voltage.

2 (the same 2) to argue back and forth endlessly as to whether a light bulb is driven by current or voltage.

2 (the same 2... again) to argue back and forth endlessly as to whether a light bulb is driven by current or voltage.

1 to tell the 2 to get a room.

1 group of objectivists clamoring for data proving that the light bulb is indeed dead.

1 group of subjectivists accusing the objectivists of being blind fools.

both groups accusing the other of being in the dark, regardless of the state of the bulb.

1 tree-hugger to point out that the replacemnet bulb will consume the energy equivalent of 5 Sequoia Redwood trees and 4 Manatees.

1 MIT-cum-laude-engineer turned SUV-drivng-real-estate-agent-accident-lawyer-breast-surgeon to correct the tree-hugger's math and point out that the energy equivalent will be less than that of one tree-hugger.

6 to point out that a 30 Watt bulb can be used in place of a 60 Watt bulb, to the same effect, if the wiring is changed to silver.

5 to point out that the 50 Watt bulb if placed in series with a rectifier will indeed produce 12.5 Watts and the resulting orange glow can be used to restore hardwood floors in minutes.

3 to say that they observed striking improvements in the quality of light by using 400 pound isolation transformers.

3 (the same 3) to argue that the socket material has more to do with light quality than the bulb itself.

1 (1 of the 3) jobless-old-money-rich-guy to talk about his Teflon sockets.

1 group to argue that real light can only be produced by incandescent bulbs and that light produced by fluorescents or LEDs is harsh and gritty (these guys might be right... BTW).

1 group to counter that incandescents are inefficient and costly with limited service lives.

7 to argue that phasing is important and that the outer portion of the socket should always be connected to neutral.

31 to counter that the driving current is indeed alternating.

4 to point out that balanced AC is the only way to see the light.

9 to point out that they have doubled bulb life by placing heavy silicone rings on the bulb.

21 to point out that cryo-treated bulbs are brighter and last longer.

17 to point out that braided cat5 wiring will produce cleaner light.

11 to point out that knitted cat5 wiring will blow braided away.

1 retiree to wax poetic about the true light of candles.

1 (another retiree) to second that remembrance.

2 to link to the obscure works of Kandhel Abra on the design of candle array.

1 to provide links to his site where both Russian candles and bulbs can be purchased.

1 guy from Taiwan (lives in a palace with a hundred concubines)to point out that he can supply any type of bulb... for about 2% less that 7-Eleven.

2 guys from eastern Europe (especially Carpathia) to express the fact that they hate all light.

1 French guy to assert that Edison was actually French.

2 more French guys, arguing with the first French guy, also asserting that Edison was French.

5 Irish guys to assert that only 5 are required to change a light bulb; 1 to hold the bulb, 4 to drink until the room spins.

1 Scott to explain that he has been thinking about buying a light bulb for quite awhile.

1 German asking where he can purchase a 59 Watt bulb instead a 60 Watt.

1 Brit complaining that 60 Watt bulbs are now illegal.

1 guy from Tibet asking what a light bulb is used for.

0 guys from Japan asking about write bobes...

1 guy from China asking if heavy bulbs will work as good as light bulbs.

1 guy from Nigeria offering chairs in hiz his knew lite bowlb phactury.

1 Canadian guy complaining that dead light bulbs should not be discriminated against.

2 Italian guys, posting entirely in Italian... occasionally "Da Vinci" can be spotted in the text.

2 Iranian guys asking for blueprints for a light bulb factory.

1 French guy selling plans for Edison's first bulb.

1 Indian guy selling plans for Edison's third bulb.

1 American consortium offering a bulb factory and technology transfer in exchange for oil.

4 guys from from Norway, Sweden, Finland, and Alaska wanting to buy 24 hour 100% duty-factor light bulbs.

12 guys posting photos of their light bulb projects using bubinga and poziila wood... now an orangutan lives in a refridgerator box off scraps from the Malaysian Micky Dee's.

1 guy explains that the dead bulb should be twisted counter-clockwise from the socket until free; and the reverse action should be repeated with new bulb until firmly seated.

1 mod to delete his post and move the thread to "off topic"

[EC8010]

1 European Community to define the correct term as "thermo-electric visible radiation emitter" and to declare it illegal not because of the appalling inefficiency, but because the two blobs of solder on the end contain lead.