Funniest snake oil theories

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Spinning

Still enjoying my return to vinyl, but viewing some LPS for sale, it seems some oil of serpents have been missed.
How about composite discs, metal to add mass up to a totaled (��) 180 grams, without changing your cartridge tracking angle?
Sandwich layered discs, with Sorbothane, to lower disc resonance frequency?
How about old favourites with a degaussing coil embedded, for moving coil users?
Or moving magnet users, then make a step up transformer available!
I'm surprised Synergistic Research hasn't addressed these previously unknown issues
 
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I call it the audio PET ROCK.

Which was an ingenuous way to sell nothing for something.

I assume the PET ROCK is known in Europe?

At the risk of repeating something already said (I haven't read the entire thread...) I read somewhere many years ago that when the pet rock craze died down, the entrepreneur gave the remaining stock away to orphanages and took a hefty tax write-off. Probably an urban legend, but brilliant idea nonetheless.
 
Wait!? What did I miss? Ground Boxes? damn, what a great idea! So instead of worrying about grounding things properly in the system itself, I just bring in a box of ground and set it next to the preamp? Cool! But, I am not sure about the box part. I mean ground is ground.. like dirt.. so the box surely has some stray capacitance that is likely to collapse the soundstage, tribulate the treble, muddle the mids and bogosify the bass.

I suspect if we could make the ground box large enough, and conductive enough, then it would really start to approximate ground.

So I suspect the proper specs are to make a ground box from silver. Must be about 1/8 inch thick, and as large as possible. Then fill it with dirt and attach all of the audio component grounds to it. SUPERB sound ...
 
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Hmmm... cables to ground... :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
And... wire size (again?! not, is my take :p)
If one reviewer ever saw a voice coil wire size, maybe will start to complain about the interconnect wire size :rolleyes: or not, since magic is already here :eek:
Of course, to maintain some DF, the "interconnect" wire needs to have larger gauge than voice coil wire, but not by thaaat much;)

Last thing about cables crossing my mind... about coaxial and TOSLINK in S-PDIF appliances. The coaxial cable needs to have good characteristic impedance and strong shield, to carry the groud loop current and RF between equipments, to not result in additional jitter, depending to receiver. Good receivers will ignore them. Not need to use snake oil cables; a bunch of commercial RF cables do it perfectly.
But I use TOSLINK :eek:!! Why? These thing have a lot of jitter! Yes, but is HF jitter. Good PLL stages eliminate them easily, but "60Hz jitter" is more difficult. Is lower than most PLL cutoff. But the truth about my choice is because it eliminates 100% of coupling between my PC and DAC, so the DAC /amp noise floor is better, and the absence of loop currents circulating between PSU/internal circuit for these appliances do not cause additional noise/jitter/etcetc:cool:
And is because of this I don't like to interconnect large audio equipments with unbalanced conductive cables. Is all about basic and measurable performance. I also self-permits USB DAC with RaspBerry or perhaps laptop (since the PSU is smaller). Of course, exceptions exists.
 
May NOT be snake oil, but entertaining to be sure!

From a Polk Audio forum thread titled Is it OK to use different length speaker cables?

"I would get the same length cables. After some period of time it is good to swap cables as the electrons should be readjusted between left and right flows.

...don't forget to swap cables if you move to the Southern Hemisphere. Remember the Coriolis Effect!"
 
May NOT be snake oil, but entertaining to be sure!

From a Polk Audio forum thread titled Is it OK to use different length speaker cables?

"I would get the same length cables. After some period of time it is good to swap cables as the electrons should be readjusted between left and right flows.

...don't forget to swap cables if you move to the Southern Hemisphere. Remember the Coriolis Effect!"

Coriolis only applies if the cables are changing earth rotational radius, so the trick is to make certain that the cables are dead flat on the floor (or preferably above the floor on expensive dielectrically neutral cable stands and chases (see other posts on this!)), and ALSO run strictly east-west. Any north-south element and the dread Coriolis will come into play sending the electrons on non-axial trajectories, and thereby banging into the surface of the wires!
The result is excessive phase delay and in the, worst case microphonics cause by electron crowding (more typically called electron spatial density fluctuations (ESDF) in true audiophile lingo)!!!:D
 
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Fifty Euros for a f890ing sticker!

Why am I working so hard every day? I'm obviously doing it wrong.

Actually, the tuning chips are 59 Euros.. That must be because instead of merely being a sticker, they are "made from an aluminium plate with a fine engraving" (!!!) and of course, don't forget the "Blue Tack".

These tuning chips apparently do a great deal for applying "harmonizing energy"..

I like the obvious marketing ploy that "multiple chips increase the effect" (!!)

And, of course it is impossible to overlook that fact that "The Akiko Audio Tuning Chips result from the knowledge and insight we gained by developing our other tuning products over the past years. The energetic process has been developed entirely by ourselves."

That's comforting..

I wonder if I traced the edges of my power cords with a green sharpie if it would smooth out the energy flow and reduce the bad humors in the cable..
 
Snake oil and you !!! [url said:
http://youtu.be/KWb2yxWx8YA[/url]

Doesn't matter.
I just decided not to converse with an idiot, anymore, because he wouldn't stop texting me with prattling nonsense, after I mentioned Bob Carver's challenge, where he made a stock amp sound audibly indistinguishable from a Conrad Johnson Premier 5.
The nonsense includes, but isn't limited to:
The test was flawed, because Atkinson was deaf.
Atkinson doesn't know how to listen.
The test was blind, so Atkinson didn't know what amp he was hearing.
Me mentioning the test was an assault on his Cary 45s.
Me mentioning the challenge was an assault on Audionote.
The test system was so inferior, it couldn't even reveal differences between cables.
There will always be those who believe magic wire will improve the original signal, even if only they can hear the improvement.
Sadly, it is perhaps the only way they have to feel superior, judging from their wives' disposition.
 
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